I’ve just parked in the driveway. It’s late, it’s been a long day. The sun has set, and I can see the little living room lamp that is on from the window. I rest my head back on the seat’s rest and take a couple breaths to compose myself before going in.
___
I walk through the front door, and Rebecca is there to greet me, “Hi Dear” she says calmly as I give her a kiss on the cheek.
“Hi, how was your day?” I respond with a similar tone of voice.
Rebecca exhales a large sigh,“I’m really worried about your mother, she had a nightmare today and woke up screaming. It took me an hour to calm her down …I think her dementia is getting worse”.
“Shoot, I’m sorry honey, thank you for letting me know. I know it’s been hard” I say with a voice of worry.
Rebecca continues, “I … I think we should take her to the doctors, get her on some medication”.
“No, no. I don’t want to put her on medications, you know what they’ll do to her”, I try to remind her in a gentle way. “At least now, there are still glimpses, small moments of time there she remembers …”.
Hopefully she understands, I want to hold onto as much of my mothers memory and personality when I still can. When I still have the option to. Rebecca shrugs,
“Okay, yeah” she says discouraged.
“I know this is hard, but this is a test for us. It will pay off”, I say with watery eyes.
Rebecca looks at me with an ere of concern, she can always tell when something is bothering me. It is effortless, intuitive for her, “I heard your car pull in, is everything okay?” she says calmly.
“I’ve had a very hard day today, …” I say, nearly tearing up thinking of the scene.
Rebecca wraps her arms around me, “I’m sorry”.
I release a sigh, “Are the girls sleeping?”.
“Yes”, she responds quietly.
“We should get to bed then, hey” I say, looking forward to some rest.
“Of course, you have a long day tomorrow”, Rebecca replies.
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